How transitioning back to work can offer a roadmap to resilience

Ah the zen vacation, the year long sabbatical, the parental leave, the short mini-break where you immersed yourself in 4 days at the beach or hiking in the back woods somewhere.

And, now it’s time to head back to work.

Heading back to work can sometimes feel like a mixed bag of emotions no matter if you run your own business or are an employee.

There have been years where I’ve reluctantly gone back (almost in tears), some years when I’ve been indifferent and years where I genuinely looked forward to starting back on Monday morning. Luckily, the latter has been much more often.

Where ever you are…the feelings you have when you’re ’heading back in’ can be telling. We often want to push them aside and get on with it, but did you know that those emotions and feelings hold incredible amounts of information for you?

If you’re feeling reluctant, anxious, dread, uncertainty, sadness, joy, or excitement, there’s information in here not to be shoved aside, but to be experienced and listened to. And then, what to do about that information?

It could mean things like, needing to set different boundaries, managing your day better so you have pockets of time where you focus on YOUR main priorities rather than someone else’s. It could be that you need to have a conversation with your direct manager about your career progression. Or perhaps, you need to have a conversation that you’ve been putting off with your supplier or problem client.

Conversely, if you’re enthused to return, what is that about? What aspects of your day are you enjoying right now? Or could it mean you’re craving more social interaction?

Time away from your day-to-day are opportunities to set your challenges aside, disconnect, try new things, or just simply rejuvenate. If you’d like a reminder of the benefits of being away, check out my last note on this topic.

But, if at the end, this brings up a myriad of feelings and emotions as you prepare to come back in - don’t discount that. Check-in.

Susan David, psychologist, research and author of Emotional Agility and presenter of two TEDTalks states in one that “… when emotions are pushed aside or ignored, they get stronger.” And, “Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life”

She goes on to say “…that the radical acceptance of all of our emotions, even the messy, difficult ones is the cornerstone to resilience, thriving, and true authentic happiness.”

In practice, she says that after acknowledging our emotions, asking a powerful question can help guide us in our day-to-day interactions in life, work, career and relationships.

Now that I noticed I’m feeling x, ask yourself, ‘Which action will take me closer to my values?’ or ‘What options do I have available to me?’.

So, I used the return from a vacation and heading back to work as an example that historically has brought up a myriad of different emotions in me and I’m taking a gamble that they have for you too, over time. If you look back on those more memorable moments, in hindsight, I bet you now better understand why you felt the way you did.

But there are so many other situations that bring with them strong emotions. What if we could take the time to listen to what our inside world is telling us sooner? We would be able to act and make decisions (even the action of not changing anything is a decision) and generally be better informed.

If we tuned in to how we feel more often, this can be a powerful place to work from and make decisions from that could support us to be more resilient and thrive.

If you’re looking for a resource on this topic I invite you to check out Susan David’s book or view her TedTalks.

NOW is YOUR time

Ariana